How to deal with condescending people

Besides the one-time $75 start-up fee, I don't have good music to sell, but I can sing and arrange music really well! How do I make my music good enough to sell? I am inspired to write music only when I'm experiencing a special relationship with someone! But he's gone, and I'm being spied on by really hateful people! I want to write, but hate makes me stop writing!